Houston: 
Howdy y'all. Houston here. Why, me and 30 of my pals were relinquished from a Texas breeder. Even made dem fancy newscasts. Anywhoo, some kind-hearted folks sprung me from that yucky situation and drove me on the interstates all the way up to New York. And I mean it, you yankees be treatin' me real nice. I don't mean to brag, but I'm now up to date on shots! Yee-haw! And boy it sure feels good to no longer have them nasty fleas using my tail for a tailgate party. And I'm finally neutered, which means I am no longer a stud in the literal sense of the word, but rather a "stud" like "stud muffin". Good lookin' and fit as a fiddle. That's me.
But listen here. Overall, my personality and temperament is hunky dorey. I'm a very gentle soul. Sweeter and softer than homemade puddin'. Perfectly content to lay on your lap or stretch out on the kitchen floor, whichever the case may be. I ain't bothered by nobody. Dogs, cats, kids, strangers... they're all dandy to me. Just so long as they ain't goin' after my food or taking toys out of my mouth! Crates don't bother me neither. Heck, I spent the majority of my life in a crate, so I feel right at home. I swear, you won't find a more laid-back gentlemen. My foster mama says I'm one step up from owning a stuffed teddy bear. So why not rope me in & let me be your southern comfort. I'm fixin to meet you!
I am now completely housebroken, just so long as there's a regular routine for me to follow. I no longer growl over my food dish (but I will still growl over treats if another dog tries to steal it out of my mouth). I fully recognize my name. I understand "come", "sit" and "no". No longer afraid of stairs, and will run up and down them quickly. Quite frankly, I've made such incredible progress in my foster home that you'd never guess I came from such a crazy situation. Perhaps I can adopt you?
My virtual foster family is Webster Del Sorbo in Amherst, NY
My virtual foster mom is Teresa Armon in East Schodack, NY